Gray Hairs...

Ok I'm 32 and I will admit that I have two or three gray hairs....Thankfully God had placed them on my head in places where they are hidden.

However.....

In looking at the past 48 hours I am expecting the "Skunk Stripe" any day now.

Why??

Because of this little joy of my life, my beautiful ray of sunshine...

I LOVE HER!!! I truly do but man...she has been pushing buttons like you wouldn't believe.  Anything that I say NO to her is response is YES.
And of course her little brother is just following right behind her so I'm getting the double dose of acting out that I normally get.

She's seven going on seventeen and I don't like it...but I do LOVE her.
and in the midst of our tiffs all I see is this...

my sweet baby my first baby blessing and I am so thankful for her...but today I am not thankful for her attitude.

I know it's the age and I know it's a phase..something that we and I must endure.

But..
I will stay in charge whether she likes it or not.  Because I know that if I don't I will pay for it later and so will she.

She might not like me today but my hope is that she will love me tomorrow.

As one of my closest friends put it this morning...I am her MOM not her Best Friend.  There is a difference.  As Mothers we have to make some hard decisions...they may not like the out come but we do it in the best interest for them and for their future.

She doesn't have to like me everyday of her life but she will respect me and later she will be thankful...I will compromise at times...but I will hold my ground..because I LOVE her.

XOXO Suzanne

Silence is Golden?

Have you ever heard this phrase?

I don't agree with it!

I can't tell you how many times over the past 7 to 8 weeks that I have wished for silence...just five minutes of it.  Being a new mom of three I just needed some time to reclaim my sanity.

I finally got a taste of silence for the past 24 hours. My mom took my two oldest for an overnight stay at Grandma and Grandpas.  I still had Alexander but he's not that fussy of a baby he's simple.  He's only upset when he needs to sleep, eat, or needs his pants changed.

So I pretty much had my SILENCE and I didn't like it.
Not at all..

I missed the pounding of their running feet...
I missed their laughter...
I missed their squeals...
I even missed the sound of their little bikes making circles on my kitchen floor.

I think I called to check on them a little to much but I couldn't help it.  They will be home in a few hours and I can't wait to hug them!

A mom needs a break from time to time...it makes you a better mom and I know that.  Having this break makes me realize that I need to have a little more patience with my babies...
that I need to let them be loud from time to time....
that I need to give a few more hugs and kisses...

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!

It's an amazing blessing to be a mommy...even in the hard times...and on the crazy days when I am sleep deprived and finding myself taking a few more deep breaths before exploding...I wouldn't change it or trade it for anything!

XOXO Suzanne

Getting Back to the CORE...back to the BASICS

This is another blog of more rambling...
Thoughts that I just want to get down... clear my head a little.

Do you know who you are?  Have you ever gotten to a point in your life where you have asked yourself this same question?

I have...many times...and I'm doing it again.
But on a different level this time...and it's ending with answers rather than more questions.

It's not just a question for myself but for my line as well.

When Suzanne Lay, LLC started in Spring 2009 it was from the idea of finding "balance" with in a chaotic life.  Which is where I was at the time, a new stay at home mom, a mom of two and starting up a business. 

However I was not the only designer in the STL area with this idea.  Once I found out about the other line I started to "rethink".   The next few seasons leaned more towards a chic, fun and flirty style.  But then again...there was a write up on a few of the designers in the STL area and I now sounded like another line and a different designer. 

I have nothing against these other designers they are all talented I just have a thing where I don't want to look like anyone else and I don't want to sound like anyone else.  This resulted in more "rethinking" and landed us in the funky, trendy, and sexy category. 

All these changes started to lead to confusion...for my line...but also for myself as my line is suppose to embody who I am.

I do feel that at each point of change my line did reflect my life in some way.  And within each collection I did create pieces that I loved.

But...

After having Alex I went into our closet to get rid of the Maternity clothing because we are done having babies.  The baby making phase of our lives has ended.  What started as a simple purge...resulted in a complete wardrobe overhaul.

When I was done...there wasn't much left.  I looked at what was on the bed...guess what..it was most of my "trendy" items.  I still had some trendy items hanging in front of me but not many.  What was mostly left hanging was "Casual" Pieces and "Tailored" pieces.  So I stared at them for a while...then I turned around. 

On the other side of our closet is my husbands clothes...first of all he encompasses more of the closet than I do..which makes no sense what so ever being that I am the "Fashion Designer".  But beyond that his style is conservative...and mine isn't really.  Deeper than that...he's my opposite.  Any one that knows us knows that we are complete opposites from our style in clothing to what we eat.  The true meaning of "opposites attract"...and while we are completely different on so many levels...be balance each other...and we thrive on each other.  I can't imagine my life without him!

Smiling I turned back around to stare at what was left once again and I realized what had been there the whole time...I'm not one or the other... I am both.  Just like Rob and I balance each other so do the items left in my closet.

I LOVE OPPOSITES!

So has the line taken another turn...not really.
It's just going back to the core...back to the basics..back to the essence of who I am.

And who is that?
I'm proof that opposites attract!

I'm not going to over think it anymore...I'm just going to do what I love.
I still want to dress women on the red carpet...but I also want to dress my best friends.

So what's next for Suzanne Lay, LLC?
Tailored and Casual
Hard and Soft
Structure and Draping
Country and ROCK

XOXO Suzanne

A Pro in the Making

I don't know what my babies will do when they grow up.

My prayer is that they have a Dream and that they never give up on it!

Tyler is signed up for Baseball this season.

He has his Cleats, Glove, and Baseball...he's ready to go!

He's got a pretty wicked arm and hit as well...I'm excited to see him play in the next few weeks :)

Who knows maybe we have a future leager on our hands..as long as he enjoys playing that's all I care about!

XOXO Suzanne